Take Back Your Power By Looking Ahead
There comes a time in life when we are overwhelmed by whatever is happening around us such that we do not see a way forward. The journey forward looks bleak and what is happening on the sides does not seem to offer hope either. Such feelings are not only triggered by huge events. It can be a result of failing to get that one job we think is all we need to improve our lives, fear, loneliness and feeling low, being misunderstood, and missed opportunities among other things.
What makes things even harder is that when things are not going well we often dwell so much on these unpleasant situations to the extent that they steal a greater part of our lives. We try to find answers as to why certain things are happening to us (why me?), wondering if we’d be in a better position if we’d done things differently (if only I’d done it earlier or differently) and whether things will ever get better for us and life be easier (am I cursed?). Once we start dwelling too much on these questions and many other, the spirit is overwhelmed and can’t be nothing but low. We give attention to negatives and the memory is put in a position where it recalls nothing other than more unfavorable situations from the past just to verify our thoughts that our lives are a mess and we can never have it easier like other ‘normal people’.
Okay, the day is done, you have made it a point that you stay in that painful place and also made yourself feeling unworthy and unlucky. Then what? You are still in that same position if not worse than when you started. Did looking back and entertaining the negative thoughts about yourself help in any way? No. That is a whole day or a couple of hours wasted on something that only pulls you back. If anything, dealing with our problems in that manner weakens us and keeps us from progressing. Of course, it is not easy dealing with unfavorable situations but, what if we tried to keep a level head? What if instead of crying going backward, we cry looking ahead and in doing so, we also try to ensure that our eyes are clear enough to see the way?
If you want to live a more prosperous and happier life, you need to learn to keep looking ahead no matter what. The following can help you keep your eyes fixed on the goal even when you encounter obstacles;
1. Let go of the past — do not hold on to your past. Some have missed great opportunities because they have been expecting history to repeat itself. Find ways to heal, hold on to important lessons that add value to your life, and give yourself a chance to live and enjoy life. Do not hold on to failed dreams or what could have been.
2. Learning to survive and live with challenges — everyone will certainly face challenges in their life regardless of social or financial status. Understanding that you are not spared from meeting challenges will make you more prepared to deal with them. Everyone else around you also has issues. Understand that they are part of life and there often is something to learn from them while they can also force you to consider leaving your comfort zone. Allow challenges to always push you forward and you will be unstoppable. Stress less. Stressing does not change the situation.
3. Block any thoughts that validate feelings that you are nothing and are hopeless — nothing can make you powerless than a negative state of mind. Train your mind to look for positives more than you look for negatives in every situation.
4. Learn how to deal with uncertainty the right way — uncertainty does scare many people while to others it is the suspense that makes life more interesting. Facing uncertainty head-on helps you gain confidence and exposes you to new things and opportunities. Life becomes more adventurous as you challenge yourself to stand up to uncertainty than when you pull back and give up before giving it a try.
5. Get rid of the belief that you are destined for failure — when we have lost so much and have had our fair share of unfortunate events, we tend to ask ourselves whether our lives are meant to be like that; characterized by unending pain and disappointments. However, we only get such ideas when we give ourselves time to do a stocktake of our lives based on past events. When you look forward with hope for a better future you get the energy to march on with confidence and create strategies to improve your life, while the belief that you are destined for failure keeps you from moving. You stop trying or, you do less because you believe you will always fail even if you give it your best.
6. Talk to someone — having someone or a group that can help keep you going is important. Most people do get to a point where they feel hopeless and no matter how hard they try they can’t change how they feel about the situation. Having a support group can remind you where you are going and why you cannot look back.
7. Stop with the blame game — change your thoughts and take full control of your life. If you wait for people to take responsibility for what happens in your life or what they did to you, you will be stuck in that place. Whatever happens or is done to you, the power to keep things moving is in your hands. No one can defeat you unless you defeat yourself first.